Coping with Separation Anxiety: Beneficial Ways to Solving the Problem

Let me start off by saying not every woman is the same. If you are like my mother-in-law, who was able to flawlessly get back into her old routine, lucky you. If you are like me and suffering from post-partum depression or fighting the anxiety of being away from your new baby, just remember you are not alone. I finally spoke with my baby's pediatrician on how I've been feeling and he suggested that I should speak with a therapist on how best to deal with these issues. Already being predisposed to suffering from anxiety attacks, I went to speak with a family friend, who is also a licensed therapist, I spoke about how I felt when I experienced the these issues and more. He suggested that I start correcting myself by:

1) Allowing myself to feel the anxiety. By doing breathing exercises that I learned from yoga class it kept my mind and body calm while reassuring myself that it is natural to feel the anxiety. Like most uncomfortable experiences it passed.
2) If I start to rush through my time alone I was instructed to add an additional ten minutes onto my time and find something else to occupy my mind. I find that visiting an equestrian park has a great affect on me. I get obsorbed in taking care of the horse and feeling the movement as I ride through the woods.
3) Don't watch the clock or track time. I am meticulous when managing my time. when I leave to do something I pretend that time does not exist and return to my baby when I was ready and relaxed. Plus it also give my husband time to bond with our daughter.

*Note to Readers: I take my breast pump with me just in case I might be gone longer than two hours. It helps me not rush through my fun.

4) If I'm out with my husband on a date I hand my phone to him or leave it at home. Leave the 'checking in' responsibility to your significant other. I found that I was calling my mother-in-law way too much to check on our daughter.
5) When my baby is with someone else I walk away and go write in my journal or read a book for 30 minutes and again return when the anxiety has passed and I am ready.

At first, a lot of these steps are easier said than done, and may be intimidating. But as long as you start small in challenging yourself to walkaway from your baby to regain your confidence the more your baby will be comfortable you leaving as well.

Here is a list of starting small: if you are alone in the house

1. Leaving your baby in their crib for 10 minutes. Make sure you have the monitor with you, but do something relaxing. Whether it is enjoying a cup of tea or cocoa to working on a puzzle.
2. While taking a shower put baby in a swing or carseat on the floor with toys. Again it allows you to enjoy yourself while keeping an eye on the little one as well.

When I started working on my separation anxiety I would hand my daughter to my husband and take a twenty minute shower with calm music playing. I did that for about two weeks then I added thirty minutes on to my time away daily from my baby. I started taking 45 minute to hour long naps without listening for my daughter. But keep in mind people are different and move at your own pace. If you force yourself to take bigger steps than you are ready for it will hurt you and your baby more than help you two. Remember you, your baby and significant other are in this together.

Thank you for visiting my blog. If you have any comments, topic ideas or want to share what works for you, leave a  message in the comment box or email me at ferguson.sabrina15@gmail.com and I will be more than happy to respond to you.

Until Tomorrow Then!